


Edward Elric and the Philosopher's Stone

by PostMortemPixie



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 1: Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-11
Packaged: 2018-04-03 13:52:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4103302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PostMortemPixie/pseuds/PostMortemPixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Edward is visited by a magical being who can turn back time, so he asks if he can go back to when he tried to bring his mother back to life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

Edward Elric was lying in his bed, staring at the ceiling, trying not to fall asleep. For the past few nights his dreams had been haunted by horrible memories. It was a warm night and he was finding it difficult to stay awake, and it didn't help that Alphonse had to sleep in another room -even though he can't even sleep!- so he couldn't talk to him to try to wake up some more.

An owl fluttered by his window and he briefly wondered, ' _Do owls have nightmares too?_ ' but dismissed the question before thinking about it any further than just forming the question.

The owl swooped by again, this the closer to his room and closer to the ground. It was probably chasing something for food.

After a few minutes of just lying there Edward felt a rush of wind and a sudden pressure at the food of his bed -of course it was just the blankets moving that he felt as his feet were at least a foot away from the edge of the bed.

He lurched up and saw a woman, holding her hand out as if something was perched on it. Her skin was dark and her dress was midnight blue, decorated with silver stars that shone.

"Who the hell are you!?" He exclaimed. The woman turned to face him and he saw that her eyes were the same shade of midnight blue as her dress.

"I am Dream," her voice was smooth like silk and welcoming like a fresh mug of hot chocolate in the winter.

"Dream?" Edward asked suspiciously.

"Yes. That is my name. And you are Edward Elric."

"How do you know who I am?"

"Oh Edward," Dream laughed merrily. "I am the personifications of everyone's dreams and regrets and you have one of the strongest dreams and regrets I've cone across."

"What do you mean?"

"Something far too complicated for you to understand, but let's just say that I can turn back time to help you accomplish your wish." Edward's attention was caught by this. "You could choose your exceedingly shallow wish of being being tall and go back and force yourself to drink milk or-"

"Could you take me back to when I tried human transmutation?" Edward asked in a trance-like voice.

"Why of course, my dear Edward, if that's what you want."

"That's what I want," Edward said. He wasn't sure why he was trusting this strange woman who had just appeared on the foot of his bed and had other-worldly looks. It could be back cause the complete look of sincerity and kindness on her face and especially in her eyes, or just the tiredness. Either way he went along with her.

Dream jumped up happily and clasped her hand together, a wide smile spread across her face.

"Yay! Today Edward Elric will get to do the thing he wants most in the world to do!" She cheered. "Are you ready?" Edward nodded. "Okay!" She snapped her fingers and with a poof Edward disappeared.

Dream was laughing joyously but soon her smile begin to die down as well as her laughter. The laugh turned into a cruel chuckle and the smile into a malicious sneer.

"My, my. Again, dear sister?" A woman said from behind Dream. "How long are you going to keep this up?"

"Until I have finished fulfilling my boredom, or this gets boring, why, sis?"

"This new hobby of yours is getting old fast." Dream -who had previously been staring out the window- turned to face the speaker. The speaker was slightly chubby and was wearing a crimson dress, her pitch black hair swirled around her in massive curls.

She chuckled, "Though, I suppose I do like how you're calling yourself Dream. It fits your little charade. Well then, let's just call me Nightmare."

"Fabulous, Lu- sorry, Nightmare. Will you be working some of your trickery as well?" Dream smirked.

"Of course," Nightmare crossed her arms. "That'll make it more interesting for the both of us."

///

The sound of Dream's snap echoed in Edward's head as he searched the house that he had burned years prior. He wasn't really searching, just trying to maneuver himself in ways that won't get him caught before he had formed a plan. He wasn't quite sure exactly what the time was so he didn't know if he and Alphonse had already begun the transmutation or not.

When he reached the room where they had attempted to bring their mother back to life he was horrified to see that it was right about the time that Alphonse was about to lose his entire body. Younger Edward had already lost part of his arm and part of Alphonse's foot was missing.

Edward had to think fast. He dashed into the room and threw the two out of the room.

Both of them were screaming in confusion and pain and that was the last thing Edward heard before he had been drawn back down into the place he had been when he had lost his arm and leg.

It was right about then that he was realizing that trusting Dream was probably the stupidest thing he had ever done. Ever.

"What was getting into me!?" He quietly asked himself as he relived the horrible experience if learning the truth, but this time he wasn't really paying attention and he caught someone different than the voice that had originally been talking. The voice was rich and elegant.

"Instead of loosing your body how would you feel to be given a second chance?" It asked.

"A second chance?" Edward asked dreamily.

"Yes," the voice lured. "A second chance."

"Okay."

The second Edward said this he realized he probably shouldn't have. What was with him and agreeing to things that night?

The room -well it wasn't really a room- that he was in slowly turned dark, as if a black hole was suckibg in all the light, and he actually felt like he was being sucked into some vacuum space. Twisted and turned and bent until it stopped.

He found himself standing in the middle of a crowded station with a sign that read 'PLATFORM 9 3/4' that hung right above a crimson train.

He found his left hand clutched around a large trunk with a name tag that had his name on it.

"What the hell? Where the hell am I?"

 


	2. Hogwarts Express

Edward dug his free hand into his jacket pocket to look for a clue as to why he was there.

Nothing, only a small, clattering back.

He dug his hand in his other pocket.

This time it was a stick.

Now his hand in his pants pocket.

A ticket. This ticket read:

_Platform 9¾_

_1 September_

_11:00 AM_

_I guess I have to get on that train_ , he stepped forward, something didn’t seem right. Like his metal leg was too long. _Damn it! When I can’t go to Winry and even if I could she would make fun of me for getting shorter!_

Edward was shoved around by a few ruder kids, all of them were much taller than him, and eventually he had had enough of it and he escaped into a car with a redheaded boy and a boy with unruly black hair. Both of them looked a few years younger than him, probably about ten or eleven. The ginger wore a nice fitting sweater and jeans while the black haired boy’s clothes hung off him and appeared four times too big. Their clothes were in colours that appeared bleak next to Edward’s bright red coat.

“Uh, hey,” he said. “Can I sit here?”

“Sure,” the black haired boy nodded enthusiastically.

“Of course,” the ginger said. “I’m Ron Weasley, this is Harry Potter.”

“Nice to meet you two,” Edward said. “I’m Edward Elric.”

“Hey, Ron,” two identical boys popped their heads into the car. “Listen, we’re going down to the middle of the train. Lee Jordan’s got a giant tarantula down there.”

“Right,” Ron mumbled.

“Oh, Harry,” the twin who hadn’t been talking before was the one who spoke this time. “Did we introduce ourselves? Fred and George Weasley. Ron’s brothers.”

“Did you meet someone else?” The first twin asked.

“Yeah,” Ron said.

“I’m Edward Elric,” Edward said.

“Nice to meet you, Edward!” Both of the twin said. “Well, see ya!” The both of them disappeared.

“Are you really Harry Potter?” Ron blurted out, facing Harry. Edward watched in slight amusement and confusion as the two spoke, but he was slowly gaining information.

He was apparently on a train to a magic school, and that they called non-magical people muggles. This made him worried. He wasn’t a wizard.

He was an Alchemist.

Completely different.

“Five,” Ron said. They had been talking about their families and Harry had said something about wanting three wizard brother. “Two of my brothers, Bill and Charlie, have already graduated. You could say I have a lot to live up to. Bill was head boy, Charlie was Quidditch captain, now Percy’s a prefect and even though Fred and George mess around a lot they get good marks and everyone thinks they're funny. Everyone expects me to do as well as them and even if I do it’s no big deal. Everything I have is a hand me down, even Scabbers, my rat, used to be Percy’s.” He pulled a fat, grey rat out from his pocket.

“You have a really big family,” Edward said in awe, beginning to miss Alphones.

“Yeah,” Ron grumbled. “ _And_ I have a younger sister, Ginny who’s coming next year.”

They continued to talk more and around half past twelve there was a great clattering outside in the corridor and a smiling, dimpled woman slid back their door and said, "Anything off the trolley, dears?"

Harry leapt to his feet, as did Edward, though Ron didn’t stand up, his ears turning pink.

The trolley was covered with candies Edward had never seen before, Harry ended up buying some of everything, and Edward didn’t buy anything.

“Hungry are we?” Ron asked.

“Starving,” Harry replied. “You two can help yourselves.”

“That’s alright,” Edward said, he wasn’t that hungry and he couldn’t bring himself to eat after the foolishness of the previous few hours. “Hey, is there a way to get to our trunks from in here?”

“Yeah,” Ron said. “Actually we might as well go ahead and change into our uniforms, so we should all go.”

“Works for me,” Harry shrugged and the three left the car. Ron and Harry just grabbed their robes and ran back to the car to protect the candy but Edward took his time. He decided, out of the books that had been placed in the trunk, to read A History of Magic by Bathilda Bagshot. He grabbed the clothes that looked like the uniform the other kids were wearing out of the stack of clothes that were in the trunk.

He decided to go to one of the bathrooms to change so he could look at his automail and at least try to adjust it so they fit better.

The bathroom he found had a full length mirror and he was appalled by the sight he saw. He had all the same maladies and his hair was the same the only thing different was that he looked younger, the same as Harry and Ron.

“What the hell happened?” He asked as he touched his face. “Well, I guess that explains why my automail’s suddenly so big. Too bad there probably won’t be any automail engineers.”

He tried his best to adjust his leg, but didn’t even try with his arm. Then he changed into the uniform. He went back to his trunk and put his other clothes into it. When he got back to the car a girl with bushy brown hair was chatting with Harry and Ron and Harry’s once broken glasses were good as new.

“...Well, I’d better get back to looking for Neville’s toad,” the girl said and left the car.

“Who was that?” Edward asked when he sat back down.

“Some showoff,” Ron grumbled. “Whatever house she’s in I hope I’m not in it.” Edward ended up tuning out the conversation as he had begun to read, the magical world was surprisingly interesting.

The next time he looked up it was when three boys entered the car. Two were broad-shouldered and brutish and the one in the middle was slim, with pale blonde hair.

"Is it true?" the boy in the middle of the trio asked. "They're saying all down the train that Harry Potter's in this compartment. So it's you, is it?"

“Yes,” Harry seemed to recognize the boy.

“Oh, this is Crabbe and Goyle,” the boy said carelessly. “And I’m Malfoy, Draco Malfoy.” Malfoy looked past Harry at Ron, who had just tried concealed a laugh with a fake cough. “Think my name’s funny, do you? I don’t even need to ask who you are. Red hair, freckles, obviously poor. You’re a Weasley.” He then turned back to Harry. “You'll soon find out some wizarding families are much better than others, Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there.” He held out his hand to Harry for him to shake, but he didn’t take it.

Malfoy then seemed to have noticed Edward. “Oh, and is this a _mudblood_ here? You really should pick your friends better.” Edward wasn’t quite sure what a ‘mudblood’ was but from context and the way Ron reacted to it he could tell it was not a positive word to say the least.

“I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks,” Harry said bitterly.

"I'd be careful if I were you, Potter," he said slowly. "Unless you're a bit politer you'll go the same way as your parents. They didn't know what was good for them, either. You hang around with riffraff like the Weasleys, muggles and that Hagrid, and it'll rub off on you."

The three stood up angrily. Though Edward didn’t quite understand all of what Malfoy had said he wanted to help Harry and Ron.

“Say that again!” Ron yelled, his face turning as red as his hair.

“Oh, are you going to fight _me_?” Malfoy asked in an amused tone.

“Damn right!” Edward yelled.

At the same time Harry, “Unless you leave right now.”

“Oh, is the little pipsqueak going to fight?” Draco had now turned his attention to Edward.

“DON’T YOU CALL ME A MINIATURE FAIRY THAT EVEN A FLY COULD SWALLOW WHOLE!” Edward yelled in anger.

“I just called you a pipsqueak, besides, what would a mudblood like you be able to do to me?”

Edward was about to continue on but Harry stopped him and said, “Let it go, Edward.”

“Fine,” Edward groaned, sitting back down.

Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle left the car, Crabbe and Goyle laughing for no good reason and malfoy seemed thoroughly annoyed by the two.

“What just happened?” the brunette was back.

“Oh, nothing,” Harry said. “Just a little row.”

“Oh,” she sighed, turning to face Edward. “I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Hermione Granger.”

“Edward Elric,” Edward held out his left hand and Hermione shook it.

“Have you met Malfoy before?” Ron asked Harry and he began to explain something about having met Malfoy in some alley.

“I’ve heard of his family,” Ron said when Harry finished his story. “They were some of the first to come back to our side after You-Know-Who disappeared. Said they'd been bewitched. My dad doesn't believe it. He says Malfoy's father didn't need an excuse to go over to the Dark Side." He turned to Hermione. "Can we help you with something?"

“You haven't been fighting, have you? You'll be in trouble before we even get there!"

“We just explained that it was a little row,” Ron scowled.

Then a voice echoed through the train, "We will be reaching Hogwarts in five minutes time. Please leave your luggage on the train, it will be taken to the school separately."

Edward’s fear about the whole ‘not actually being magical’ thing came back along with lots of anxiety. Harry and Ron crammed their pockets with the remaining sweets and the four of them joined the crowd in the hallway.

The train began to slow and eventually stop. People began to flood out of the train. Edward lost Harry, Ron and Hermione in the crowd but heard a voice yelling “Firs’ years! Firs’ years this way!” He could ask the man what exactly to do when he got over there.

When Edward reached the man who had been yelling, an extremely tall man, he spotted Harry, Ron and Hermione.

“Hey, Ed!” Harry waved Edward over.

“Hey,” Edward laughed uncomfortably. “I got kind of lost in the crowd.”

"C'mon, follow me! Any more firs' years? Mind yer step, now! Firs' years follow me!" The man yelled.

“That’s Hagrid,” Harry explained quickly. “He’s the groundskeeper here.”

Slipping and stumbling, they followed Hagrid down what seemed to be a steep, narrow path. It was so dark on either side of them that Harry thought there must be thick trees there. Nobody spoke much.

“You should get yer first sight o’ Hogwarts in a sec,” Hagrid called. “Just ‘round this bend.”

There were gasps of awe and amazement as Hogwarts came into sight.

The narrow path suddenly opened up to a large opening. There was a plethora of boats strung up on a large black lake.

“No more’n four to a boat!” Hagrid called. Edward boarded a boat with Harry, Ron and Hermione. "Everyone in?" shouted Hagrid, who had a boat to himself. "Right then, FORWARD!"

The fleet of boats began to move forward as Hagrid commanded, gliding smoothly across the lake. Everyone was silent, staring at the approaching castle in front of them.

"Heads down!" yelled Hagrid as the first boats reached the cliff, they all bent their heads and the little boats carried them through a curtain of ivy that hid a wide opening in the cliff face. They were carried along a dark tunnel, which seemed to be taking them right underneath the castle, until they reached a kind of underground harbor, where they clambered out onto rocks and pebbles. They walked up a flight of stone steps and crowded around huge, oak doors. “Everyone here?”

He raised one of his gigantic fists and knocked on one of the doors.


	3. The Sorting Ceremony

The door swung open almost as soon as Hagrid knocked. A tall woman with black hair pulled into a tight bun and wearing emerald green robes was the one who opened it. She had a very stern face and she was obviously not someone you wanted to make mad.

“The firs’ years, Professor McGonagall,” Hagrid said.

“Thank you, Hagrid,” the woman said. “I will take them from here.” She opened the door wider and the first years followed her through.

The Great Hall was huge, Edward was sure that multiple houses could fit in the one room alone.

“It’s amazing,” Edward mumbled as he looked around.

"Welcome to Hogwarts," said Professor McGonagall. "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room.

"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule breaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, the house  with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours.

"The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting. I shall return when we are ready for you," said Professor McGonagall. "Please wait quietly."

She exited the chamber that the first years had been guided into.

Edward opened his mouth to ask a question but Harry asked it before he could. “How exactly do they sort us?” Harry asked Ron.

"Some sort of test, I think. Fred said it hurts a lot. He might’ve mentioned something about fighting a dragon."

“WHAT!” Edward exclaimed.

“That can't be true,” Hermione stated.

“You’re not serious, are you?” Harry asked.

“I think he was just joking,” Ron said as though he was thinking hardly and Harry and Edward let out a sigh of relief.

“Oh, damn it,” Edward grumbled.

“What is it?” Hermione asked.

“I just realized that I forgot to put my book back up with the rest of my things.”

“Some robes have pockets on the inside,” Ron said. “Check yours.” Edward slid his hands around the inside of his robe until he found one a little under the right arm hole.

“Thanks,” Edward smiled. Then, somebody screamed.

Edward gasped, as did almost everyone else, as about twenty ghosts floated through the walls. Completely white and transparent, glancing at the first years.

 _That’s... impossible_ , Edward thought in alarm. _How could it be? Humans can’t be brought back from the dead_. He clutched his hands into fists and bit his lip to keep himself from crying as he remembered the image of when he tried to bring his mom back.

When he started to pay attention again some of the ghosts seemed to be arguing about something.

"New students!" said one that looked like a fat monk, smiling around at them. "About to be sorted, I suppose?" A few people nodded. "Hope to see you in Hufflepuff! My old house, you know."

"Move along now," said Mcgonagall’s sharp voice, she had apparently returned. "The Sorting Ceremony's about to start. Now, form a line.” Everyone shuffled around each other to make a line as McGonagall instructed.

Edward got behind Hermione and was in front of a mean-looking brunette boy. McGonagall lead them through two huge doors into the Great Hall.

It was lit by thousands of floating candles and there were four long tables with different banners hanging above them. One was green and silver, another was yellow and black, then a blue and silver one and finally a red and gold banner. The green one had a snake, the yellow one a badger, the blue one a raven and the red one a lion printed on them. There was a long table at the front that was probably the teachers table as all of the people at the table were adults. It had a banner with all of the animals one the other four banners surrounding an ‘H’.

Edward noticed that Harry was staring upwards and followed his gaze. The ceiling was a dark, midnight blue much like Dream’s dress, and it was decorated with small silver dots.

“It’s bewitched to look like the night sky,” Hermione whispered eagerly. “I read it in Hogwarts A History.”

Edward looked down after that to avoid running into anyone and he saw Professor McGonagall setting a stool and an old hat in front of the first years.

There was some snickering from the first years and Edward said to Harry, “Maybe instead of fighting dragons we have to pull out a rabbit.” The two of them laughed silently.

Then, what looked to be the hat’s mouth opened and it began to sing:

“Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,

“But don't judge on what you see,

“I'll eat myself if you can find

“A smarter hat than me.

“You can keep your bowlers black,

“Your top hats sleek and tall,

“For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat

“And I can cap them all.

“There's nothing hidden in your head

“The Sorting Hat can't see,

“So try me on and I will tell you

“Where you ought to be.

“You might belong in Gryffindor,

“Where dwell the brave at heart,

“Their daring, nerve, and chivalry

“Set Gryffindors apart;

“You might belong in Hufflepuff,

“Where they are just and loyal,

“Those patient Hufflepuffs are true

“And unafraid of toil;

“Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,

“If you've a ready mind,

“Where those of wit and learning,

“Will always find their kind;

“Or perhaps in Slytherin

“You'll make your real friends,

“Those cunning folk use any means

“To achieve their ends.

“So put me on!

“Don't be afraid!

“And don't get in a flap!

“You're in safe hands (though I have none)

“For I'm a Thinking Cap!"

The hall burst into applause as the last word resounded through the large hall.

“So we’ve just got to try on the hat!” Ron sighed in relief.

“That’s better than pulling a rabbit out or fighting a dragon,” Harry agreed.

Professor McGonagall stepped forward, holding a scroll, “When I call your name come forward and put on the hat and sit on the stool. Abbott, Hannah.” A pink-faced girl with blonde pigtails stumbled out of line, put on the hat, which fell right down over her eyes, and sat down.

Soon after the hat exclaimed, “HUFFLEPUFF!”

The yellow and black table burst into applause.

“Bones, Susan.”

“HUFFLEPUFF!”

“Boot, Terry.”

“RAVENCLAW!”

“Brocklehurst, Mandy.”

“RAVENCLAW!”

“Brown, Lavender.”

“GRYFFINDOR!”

“Bulstrode, Millicent!”

“SLYTHERIN!”

Edward began to think of other things, things he hadn’t thought about with the distraction of this magical world. Things like who is Dream, really?, Why did she come to me? and several other things.

“Elric, Edward.”

 _This must’ve been planned by someone if they have my name_ , Edward thought as he walked up and sat on the stool.

“Hmm... Interesting,” the hat spoke. “You’re different than the others.”

 _I guess,_ Edward sighed to the hat.

"I can't exactly tell what it is. Anyways, let's see..."

After a few seconds the hat yelled out loud, "GRYFFINDOR!"

Edward slipped of the stool, placed the hat back on the stool and sat at the Gryffindor table by a girl with blonde hair and green glasses who had been sorted earlier. He thought he remembered that her name was something like Lisa Drummond. She seemed kind of grumpy and just generally mean looking. Her appearance alone reminded him of someone.

“Hey!” She smiled, appearing less grumpy. “I’m Lisa Drummond.” She held out her hand.

“Hey,” Edward shook her hand.

“I would say welcome to Hogwarts but I’m also a first year.” She laughed merrily as they withdrew their hands.. “I have so many older siblings that’ve come here that I feel like I’ve been here before. Although, they’ve all been Ravenclaw’s so I guess it’ll be different.”

“Ravenclaw’s the blue table, right?”

“Yep. So I take it you’re muggleborn?”

“Yeah. Are you a pureblood?”

“Duh,” Lisa snorted.

“Granger, Hermione.” Edward heard McGonagall call.

“Oh, hold on. My friend’s being sorted,” he said.

“GRYFFINDOR!” The hat called after a minute. Hermione skipped down from the stool and sat across from Edward.

“At least I already know someone in my house,” she smiled, relieved.

“I thought you’d be Ravenclaw,” Edward said.

“To be honest I thought you’d be Ravenclaw too,” Hermione admitted. “You were reading A History of Magic on the train and even got so absorbed in it you forgot to put it up.” At this Lisa nearly fell out of her chair from laughter.

“Now I’m from a family of Ravenclaws and that’s ridiculous,” she was still laughing. “I’m Lisa Drummond by the way.”

“Hermione Granger,” Hermione responded, a small smile on her lips.

“I assumed,” Lisa laughed again. “So, looking forward to wearing scarlet? Personally, I am. I’m tired of staring and blue all the time. Everywhere I turn, BLUE!”

“I don’t really know a lot about the houses, but I normally wear red so it’s not that much of a difference,” Edward shrugged.

“I’m just excited to be here,” Hermione said.

“My god. You are such a dork,” Lisa said. Hermione was about to say something else but Lisa continued. “It’s not a bad thing. It’s actually cute as hell.” A slight blush spread across Hermione’s cheeks and Lisa laughed once more.

“Longbottom, Neville,” McGonagall called.

“Oh, I know him. I was helping him look for his toad for a while on the train,” Hermione said.

“Oh, I remember him coming by my compartment,” Lisa snickered as Neville tripped over his feet.

“GRYFFINDOR!” The hat exclaimed.

“He seems more like a Hufflepuff,” Lisa said. “You know, just by his outward appearance. And clumsiness. Though it does take guts to face people after an embarrassment like that,” she gestured to Neville who was bashfully walking back to the stool and taking the shorting hat off.

Neville came and sat beside Hermione, greeting them bashfully.

“Neville, right?” Edward asked. “I’m Edward and this is Lisa.”

“Nice to meet you,” Neville said. “My gran’s going to be happy that I got into Gryffindor.”

“Hmm… Longbottom… Longbottom… Looooongbottoooooom…” Lisa thought. “That name sounds familiar… Oh! I got it! Your grandma and my mom are cousins!”

“What?” Neville asked.

“That’s a coincidence,” Hermione said.

“You must have an old mom,” Edward spoke, recieving a kick in the shin from Lisa.

“It’s not really a coincidence,” Lisa said. “Pureblood families involve a lot of complicated inbreed and basically every pureblood is related somehow, especially because of our dwindling numbers.”

“That does not sound healthy,” Hermione said.

“It’s not. Thankfully I’m not a subject of inbreeding and magic does a pretty good job of fixing any biological screw ups when it comes to that, so you know, it’s not nearly as unhealthy as muggle inbreeding.”

“I see,” Edward nodded. “So does magic fix the inbreeding in the womb or do doctors fix it after birth?”

“I don’t know. I’m not a doctor,” Lisa shrugged.

“Potter, Harry,” McGonagall called and silence spread through the Great Hall, everyone’s eyes followed Harry as he approached the sorting hat.

After a few minutes the hat yelled, “GRYFFINDOR!”

“Well, I may not know him but, that was really obvious,” Lisa said. “I mean he’s famous for killing the most famous Slytherin ever.”

Harry joined them at the table then.

“Hey, Harry,” Hermione waved.

“Hi,” Harry nodded as he sat down beside Edward.

“You didn’t tell me you’re friends with Harry Potter!” Lisa exclaimed.

“It’s not like there was a good time for it.”

“There’s _always_ time to talk about know famous people.”

“Harry, this is Lisa Drummond,” Hermione said quickly.

“Nice to meet you,” Harry said.

“Weasley, Ronald,” McGonagall called and Ron walked up to the Sorting Hat, his ears visibly pink.

“GRYFFINDOR!” The hat yelled after a few seconds.

“Good job, Ron,” the twins congratulated him as he joined Harry, Hermione, Neville, Edward and Lisa.

“Thanks,” he mumbled. “Why’re you sitting over here?” he asked Hermione.

“Because my friends are over here,” Hermione responded.

“Well, why do I have to sit next to you, why not Neville?”

“You don’t have to sit next to me. And don’t make Neville move.”

“Sorry,” Neville chuckled nervously.

“Just sit,” Edward said.

“Fine,” Ron grumbled. “Who’re you?” He asked Lisa.

“Lisa Drummond,” she replied.

The headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, stood as McGonagall took the sorting hat and stool away. He was beaming at everyone, his arms opened wide in a welcoming manner.

“Welcome!” he said. “Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!

“Thank you!” He sat back down and everyone laughed and clapped. Edward just thought he was insane.

“Is he- is he a bit mad?” Harry asked.

“Yes,” Lisa overexaggerated her nod.

“He’s not mad,” a redhead from a few seats down exclaimed. “He’s a genius! But yes, he is a bit mad.”

“Hey, Percy,” Harry waved.

“Hello, Harry.”

“Oh my god,” Edward gasped as he noticed all the food. “There’s so much food!”

“Yeah,” Lisa chuckled as Edward began to pile food onto his plate. Harry and Ron were doing the same, Hermione and Neville were talking while putting food on their plate, not a lot of food though, and Lisa had put a small amount on her plate.

“Isn’t that a little too much food for you, Shortstop?” Lisa asked Edward.

“WHO’RE YOU CALLING GERM SIZED!” Edward yelled furiously and Lisa laughed.

“You sure are sensitive.” Edward narrowed his eyes and began to eat.


End file.
